Uniquely Ours

Dear Audrey,

It's your Dad here. With the news of our TA we can't wait to head to China and bring you to your new home. How is it that we found you, uniquely you in a country of Billions. I can't wait to meet you, I can't wait to see your mom hold you for the first time. You will never know how hard she has worked and loved to bring you to us. She is truly the rock of this family and without her you would not be possible. Thanksgiving passed this week, a major holiday here in the US where families gather to give thanks for all they have. We have lots to be thankful for, dear daughter, and now we will soon have you to add to our prayers of thanks. I am so truly humbled to be your Dad. I don't even know whether I can express how important you are to us. Like you, I was adopted as was your Aunt Diane--who just had her first baby, Ava, the two of you are going to be "best" cousins. You are a few months older than her. Here she is and there's your Aunt Diane (don't let the giant freak in the red hat scare you, it's your Uncle Scott, he's a teddy bear):



I wasn't abandoned, I was brought to the Sara Fisher home a Catholic Social Services adoption agency and orphanage in Franklin, MI. Two wonderful people, who had a son, your Uncle Brian (I don't have a picture of him, but he wasn't that cute of a baby), were matched with me, like we were matched to you. They didn't have to travel to another country, but like us, they were ready to love their new baby no matter where he or she were from. Audrey, I have never felt "adopted", in fact, I am not conscious of it most of the time. My parents are incredibly loving, giving people--they too can't wait to meet you. They provided me with an amazing childhood that was my foundation for becoming an adult, a husband, father, professional...I don't know what I am good at as a father, when you understand the enormity of the undertaking--raising another human being. Those who don't understand it are unfortunate parents, but that's another topic. Half the time it is all happening so fast I feel like I am winging it (your mother thinks I am winging it too, so best to spend lots of time w her!). But I can promise you, you will never feel adopted, at least not in your heart. There a characteristics that people will point out and as you get older we will share your adoption history with you. And at some point you will wonder what that country was like from where we adopted you. And at some point you may want to travel there and see where you were born. You may even want to know who your birth mother is. Many, many little girls just as beautiful as you are left to be found, not bc their mother's didn't love them. Quite the contrary, the circumstances in your home country are such that mothers who have a baby daughter want a better life for them. They love these little babies so much that they are faced with what must be an agonizing decision. We here in America can't even guess what it must be like, but thankfully many people around the world, want to bring these babies to a new home, where they can be nurtured and loved.

I know your birth mom loved you. She probably set you safely somewhere in Kunming City, where you wait for us to this day, somewhere you could be found. She probably waited from a distance to watch you be discovered and taken to the right authorities where you would be given a chance to be adopted, at least that's what someone told her would happen or someone she knew did the same thing or God forbid she had to do this before. We simply don't know. She was probably in a great deal of pain to watch you go, knowing that after weeks of holding you as her own--she would never see you again--and believe me Audrey it takes all of a half second to fall in love with a newborn baby and feel so utterly responsible to love that tiny little being, and I expect the same experience when holding my adopted daughter for the first time. She put herself through that, all in the hopes that you might find a better life.

I don't know if your mom and I are special people, but we hope to be that "better life". As I said, many people are adopting babies from Russia, Africa, Central America and Asia. Your birth mom is a special person, you are a special person. We are just two people who love their kids and their dogs and we have room, more than enough for you. And for me personally Audrey, this is a circle completing for me: from my parents to me, from me to you. It's not more complex than that--we want you in our family and you deserve a family.


Love,

Dad